Fallen Clovers, Broken Heart
by RinoaDestiny
Summary: All the Clovers that Kazuhiko knows are gone. Has Fate dealt him a cruel hand or has he learned to accept such destiny? *SPOILERS for 'Clover' #1-4.*


Fallen Clovers, Broken Heart

Fallen Clovers, Broken Heart 

I found out all too late that life treated you like a victim. I should've known, could've known if I had been more aware. But Clovers always had an advantage over an ordinary human. It was the way it ran in my society, with even the military being involved up to the point of murder. My supposed murder, as Gingetsu told me before he died. He had known that Parliament, aware of Four-leaf Clover Suu's feelings towards me, summoned their power and hastened those killing wires to rip me to pieces. All so that Suu wouldn't be stronger than the wizards. They had to kill me to silence her power, her voice; after all, sacrifice one man's life and save the world, isn't that what they've been saying since the beginning of time?

Then Gingetsu lowered his shades and I saw for the first time since I've met him the color of his eyes. A deep blue, similar to Ran's but also hard and soft at the same time. They were also full of sorrow and even a deep regret. "Sorry" was the last word he said before he suddenly exploded in front of me, hurling me painfully into the wall. I remembered being shocked, similar to the time when I knew that Suu had killed herself just to save me. To save herself from loneliness, from lack of love and companionship. My friend's blood, as red as mine, splattered across the floor and the walls, hitting me in the process. Crimson on my glasses, turning my vision red and I screamed in agony. I hadn't screamed for Suu – how could I when I was half-dead? – and Ran raced into the living room, only to stop cold when he saw what was left of Gingetsu.

So here I was, crying out at the top of my lungs, still in shock and reawakened pain and Ran stood there, his face a mask of grief. We could not believe that our friend, our companion, our roommate was dead. Was gone, was nothing but smears and pools of red on the floor. Then suddenly, Ran kneels down and picks up what was left of Gingetsu. All that I could see was something like a hand. I had known that Ran and Gingetsu were close, but I only fully grasped their closeness when the boy gently pressed his lips to the severed limb. Gingetsu, what a man you must've been if you'd won this boy's heart over. But at least you didn't lose him first, like how I lost Suu. Instead, you took the initiative, like Suu and ended up breaking him like the way I broke.

Completely, utterly, and fully devastated.

Ran just knelt there, holding your hand like as if he could somehow bring you back to life. I could only cry silently after I'd quieted down; what kind of game was my life trying to play with me? How come I keep on losing people that I respect and love? People that are close to my heart, bound to my soul through play, work, and connections? How come you had to kill yourself like that, in front of me, reminding me of years back when I lost Suu?

Then Ran's voice breaks through the silence and I raise my head, tears filming my sight. "What is it, Ran?" I asked, my voice betraying my shaken emotions. It is trembling. Years after Suu died, I fought to regain my old self. And just when I believed myself strong, I am suddenly tossed around by this tempest and I find out that my façade has fallen off.

Kazuhiko Faye Ryu, you never learn, do you?

"Gingetsu was a Two-leaf Clover. He promised that if anything happens between us, the wizards would be able to stop that. Gingetsu set the limits…he allowed them to place a bomb in his head. That way, he'll die first and the stronger Clover will be left alone."

I stared at him in disbelief, recalling what Suu tried to tell me years ago. She pointed to her head and told me that something was wrong with Gingetsu; however, it's meaning completely passed me by because I didn't know that my friend had already marked himself for death. Now, that conversation loomed before me and I winced. She knew, with her powers as a Four-leaf Clover. And I didn't. She knew she was going to die. And I didn't. So guess whose heart bled worse and then could never stop bleeding?

"Kazuhiko, Gingetsu was always cautious with our relationship. But just last week, something changed and it got more…profound. You can't have that with a Three-leaf Clover and a Two-leaf Clover. The wizards can't harness us then. So Gingetsu told them to kill him…and they did…"

Then Ran began to sob.

Quickly, I came over to him and placing my hand on his shoulder, offered him comfort. The boy immediately leaned into me, his body shaking from the storm within him. I felt my shirt becoming soaked and I remained silent, allowing myself to grieve now without the tears. Gingetsu, commander of the Secret Colors Battalion, was now forever gone from our lives. I knew him since I was a teenager. But he was a Clover child as well and he never told me.

Should he have?

I asked Ran about Oruha and he said that she was also a Clover. A One-leaf Clover, to be exact. "And what was her power?" I asked him, looking into those deep blue eyes that achingly reminded me of Gingetsu's. Ran answered simply and bluntly, "She knew when she was going to die." Suu told me that years ago, when I was still naïve and young. It seems like now, I'm still learning about this complexity known as the Clover Project.

And finding out that everyone that's close to me are Clovers.

Leaving me alone.

Then Ran leaves, and I notice something about his gait all of a sudden. He used to walk like a healthy young teenager, without worries or troubles. And now, I notice the slight limp to his legs, so that he ends up hobbling out of my room. Did this recently happen? Or was I too blind with pain and memories to notice?

"Ran! You're –"

He turns and the expression on his face pierces through my heart. He knows something, I thought. Something's happening and he knows it, while I don't. I feel afraid for him, for me. If something happens to my last and only friend, I will never be able to pick myself up and resume my life.

"This is my last year to live, Kazuhiko. This is my fifth year."

He shouldn't have told me that. He knows his death date as well, just like Oruha. I stare at him in shock, like as if the words were daggers thrown into my face. So you too, Ran…you're also leaving me. I never knew that you were a Clover. I thought you would always be alive and happy, as happy as when you were with Gingetsu.

Gingetsu, your lover.

Now he's dead.

He must've loved you to excess.

Fifth year…Gingetsu knew.

So he loved.

Crossed a boundary he couldn't cross.

So he paid the price.

Ran, you'll be following him now to eternity as well? The silent question never leaves my lips; I simply look at Ran's face, noticing the sad eyes and the aura of maturity that had finally reached its limit. Five years…he'd been here for that long, ever since Gingetsu picked him up as a rain-soaked child with blue hair and wide dark eyes. The first time I'd come back to the apartment and found out that my partner-in-arms had chosen for us another occupant.

An occupant who had a short life span.

"Ran, when?"

I had to know.

"Soon. You'll see."

And then he's gone, like a wraith.

Oruha. Suu. Gingetsu. Ran. _Soon. You'll see._ I clench my teeth together, still wondering how I'll be able to cope once the boy's gone. I never allowed myself to love so strongly again after I lost Suu. Too much agony and wanting. I felt like a puppet on strings, being manipulated by forces that I had no control over. I keep losing friends and lovers because they're all Clovers. One-leaf, Two-leaf, Three-leaf, and Four-leaf. I've known them all.

How much have I paid for love?

I wait in dread for the day when Ran finally goes. Goes to find Gingetsu. Goes to find happiness – his own. And like the song 'Clover,' one line haunts me unbearably to this day. _I only want your happiness, knowing I can never be yours to share it._

I've given all of mine.

I know that I'll get nothing back.

____________

Ran looks up at me from the floor where he has collapsed. There is no fear and no pain. Just peace. I wonder if Suu had a similar expression. I saw a different one on Gingetsu's face. And Oruha, she was gunned down. But she was singing 'Clover' like an angel – like the way Suu described her. For once, dressed in virginal white, unlike the woman I knew her to be.

Isn't it ironic that the angel dies while singing her song?

Like as if the song were her requiem?

I hold the boy's aged body close to mine, wishing that his death would be swift and merciful. He still looks like a teenager, but something in his eyes and his body language tells me otherwise. He'd aged while the years flew past us like birds with unclipped wings. While he's shown signs of deterioration, I am still strong and I have yet to see my thirties.

But a heart can age, can't it?

"Ran, think about Gingetsu. This time, no wizards can stop you two."

He smiles, his lips tremulous with the effort. "Thank you, Kazuhiko."

I bow my head, fighting back my tears. "Wish me the same."

Another smile and then it disappears. "Watch out for 'A.' He's…my twin. A Three-leaf…like me. He'll be very angry when he finds out…finds out that I'm gone."

"Is he prone to violence?"

"He's obsessive with me. He swore to kill anyone who would separate me from him. Seeing that you're…the only one left, he'll kill you."

_Death is a welcome wish for someone living alone without friends or lovers._ "Don't worry about me, Ran. Gingetsu must be waiting. And if you see Suu…" My heart stops for a second, thudding against my chest like a dying thing. "If you see her, tell her I said, 'Hi.'"

Ran smiles and then he's gone.

I sit on the floor, Ran in my lap. Pain washes over me and I open my fist, revealing the leaf imprint on my palm. General Ko had lied to me; she told me this would vanish once I've completed my mission. But now, I see it and it hasn't faded at all. A Four-leaf Clover dead within Fairy Park, killed by her own powers. Engulfed in flames. A Two-leaf Clover slain in front of me, slaughtered by his own hand. Exploded into nothing. A One-leaf Clover, shot down by a hitman. Faded from musical existence. A Three-leaf Clover, succumbing to accelerated age. Cut down during what should've been the prime of his life.

I grieve for all those I've lost. Four lives, Four Clovers. For me, finding any sort of Clover, never mind a Four-leaf, hasn't brought me happiness. Instead, it's brought me pain upon pain, salt upon each fresh wound, and old wounds being ripped open to bleed some more. I find out that living is hard when you are afraid to love.

And then something in the atmosphere around me changes.

I look up, only to find myself staring at what seems to be Ran at a younger age. But Ran is still in my lap, dead. This must be 'A' then, Ran's twin. A Three-leaf Clover.

But something is startling different about his eyes.

Angry.

Obsessive.

Full of tempests.

Vengeful.

He screams, his voice shrill with agony and rage. "You took him away from me! 'C' was mine!" Those dark blue eyes slant dangerously, brimming with tears. "'C' was mine! I'll make you pay for separating him from me!"

_If Gingetsu were still alive, would he be facing him?_ No doubt he would, because he was the one who found Ran. I came up the stairs, surprised that my stoic roommate had taken affection to a younger boy. Guess who didn't help me out in the kitchen later that night? It's strange the things you think of when you know you're going to die. Here I was, facing Ran's twin, unarmed and powerless. It would have mattered less if I had my weapon with me. He was a Three-leaf Clover and what was I? Just an ordinary human who'd lost my last friend.

Suu was a Four-leaf Clover.

Ran's twin, 'A' was a Three-leaf Clover.

I was ready to forfeit my life.

"You killed him! You took him away from me!" 'A's' eyes suddenly flared white and I backed away, releasing Ran in my fear. "You bastard, I'll kill you for that!!!" Glass from the windows behind me shattered; the sound terrified me, making my blood cold. A sharp pain sliced through my arm and I fell to the floor, holding the wounded limb. Blood quickly pooled on the checkered floor, red playing on black and white squares. Crimson on tessellations. Another pain, harsher than the first, caught me through the back. Everything went hazy, then white.

Was I impaled?

Blood soaked my black clothes and I remembered through the pain another time when I had been this close to dying. Wires…blood…Suu crying out my name. I was much closer to the brink now, though, and with 'A' to ensure that I died – I knew this was the end. My arm no longer worked, since 'A' managed to sever a tendon. I didn't remember falling, just felt like as if I was dissolving, melting through all of the pain my body tried to endure. A slash of vicious wind slices past my face and my cheek bleeds.

Meanwhile, 'A's' screaming, crying, and laughing.

Things are getting dark. I cannot see much now. There is no more feeling in my body, and my face is numb. There must be blood everywhere and broken glass all over the floor. So, out of everyone that I know, I'm the last to die. Meaning that I've fulfilled my own promise. I didn't want anyone to die before me and by saying that, I've doomed myself to loneliness. Because everyone else died, leaving me alone.

Is this what dying is all about?

When you're an ordinary person, not a Clover, life does treat you as an inferior. I found that out too late. My entire life has been like a game, when the pawns are all taken and the king is left defenseless. That's when the king either fights or dies.

I've tried fighting.

It didn't work for long.

I'm dying now.

Suu…Oruha…Gingetsu…Ran…would I see you…at all?

Author's Note: I came up with this fic when I realized that everyone Kazuhiko knew was a Clover. Clovers surrounded the man and being that Clovers knew their fate, Kazuhiko was in fact a victim of Fate and life. So what would happen when everyone died? How would Kazuhiko deal with it? I used the idea of Gingetsu detonating himself by will of Parliament because I haven't seen that used in a 'Clover' fanfic yet. As for 'A,' the boy was already insane, so he wouldn't care if Gingetsu was already dead. He would just lash out at anyone. To me, Kazuhiko has the worst fate and that's all because he's not even a One-leaf.~Rinoa_Destiny~


End file.
